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The Service Here
Stinks! How many times have you heard that -- due to a bad experience -- someone had given up going to church? Whether it was because of unfriendly people, a harsh message or some form of betrayal or abuse, so many people have been heard to say, "I used to go to church, but it was so full of hypocrites that I quit going. I just don't go to church anymore." My response to that would be to ask, "Well, do you eat out at restaurants? Have you ever been to a restaurant where the service was slow, the staff rude, the food bad, or the bathrooms just plain nasty? Did this cause you to stop going to restaurants? Or did you simply conclude that the management of that particular restaurant didn't know or care what they were doing?" Obviously the condition of the food or service in such a case demonstrated that their customers weren't valuable or important to them. They were more interested in looking like a good restaurant, at least on the outside, than they were in actually being a good restaurant on the inside. So, in this instance, you wisely decide that this particular eating establishment is OFF your dining list. You don't stop going out to restaurants altogether, do you? No, you just stop going to THAT restaurant, right? So, why do people use such an arbitrary and absolute standard when it comes to churches? Just as there are a wide variety of types of restaurants, different styles, different nationalities, decor, flavors, and seasonings, there are many different denominations, doctrines, and preaching styles out there in the church community! Just as there are different chefs who prepare the same dish in many different ways, every pastor and church has its own unique personality, style, and presentation of the Gospel. Just because one church messes up the menu, doesn't mean that there aren't still a lot of chefs in the business who know how to cook a gourmet meal! Writing off all churches -- or Christianity in general --because of one bad experience is more of a reflection on you than on the churches. True, the betrayal experienced at the hands of a church body, pastor, or other leaders is usually far more serious and deeply felt than simply getting overcooked pasta or cold green beans from a surly waiter. And yet, the principle is the same. A healthy, loving, Christ-filled church can not only restore your faith in the institution, but help heal the hurt and betrayal you suffered at the hands of that "other" church. If you are betrayed in a personal or romantic relationship, you don't stop dating altogether, right?. You stop dating that individual. Hopefully you recognize that that person was immature, or codependent, or just plain unhealthy for you, and then acknowledge that a healthy, committed and honest relationship is still possible -- just not with that person. Hopefully you do not let a bad experience override the knowledge that a healthy, committed, and honest relationship can and WILL bring you a lifetime of joy, growth, and fulfilling intimacy. Churches are not perfect, because they are supported, pastored, led and populated by imperfect humans who often behave or respond in imperfect, and yes, sometimes even negative and critical or hurtful ways. If you find such a church, it is not your job to "fix" it, just as it is not your job to "fix" another person in a dysfunctional relationship. Don't condemn all churches because of the flaws of a few. Find another church. Find a church that honors the Word of God, that believes in His Spirit, and that walks in His Love, understanding that salvation is found solely in God's grace, not in our works. It may take two, three, four or more tries. But there IS a church that can and will both honor God and minister to you. The other side of this coin is that you shouldn't be looking for the "perfect church", because as I said before, there ain't no such thing. There is no perfect church, and the one that thinks it IS, is the one you should stay the farthest away from! Church hopping, bouncing from one church to the next, looking for the one that will best meet all of your "felt needs," is going to be about as effective and fruitful as ping-ponging from one relationship to the next, trying to find the "perfect mate." You will never find him or her, because no one is perfect, and thus no one will ever meet up to all your expectations. Thus, you will never settle down with anyone, never committing to a partnership that will help you both grow and learn from one another. To make any relationship work, it takes a willingness to work together in spite of your flaws, to forgive, to grow, and to nurture one another through the good times AND the bad. If your past is littered with a string of broken relationships, whether personal or religious, it might be time to admit that the problem might not always have been with the other "person". No restaurant is always going to fix only your favorite meals exactly the way you like them. And no waitress will ever be able to wait only on you, hand and foot, when there are other tables that need attention as well. You have to be willing to give a little to get a lot. Churches have an even higher calling and greater responsibility than restaurants, in that they deal in matters more spiritual (and thus eternal) than physical, and their fare must be prepared correctly and presented clearly in order to be digested adequately. Unhealthy spiritual food can be far more damaging to the system that merely a pasta dish high in cholesterol! So, if the service stinks, take your business elsewhere. But don't stop eating! <>< ========================================== ><> "...and
let us consider how to stimulate one another to love and good deeds,
not forsaking our own assembling together, as is the habit of some
but encouraging on eanother; and all the more as you see the day
drawing near." "...so
that there may be no division in the body, but that the members
may have the same care for another. And if one member suffers, all
the members suffer with it; if one member is honored, all the members
rejoice with it. Now you are Christ's body, and individually members
of it." <>< ========================================== ><> Copyright © 2001 by Divinspiration® |
